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The image most foreigners have of a genuine English pub is a cesspit of unsavoury characters guffawing through crooked, yellow teeth over an unsteady pint. Usually in this image, the beer gets sloshed over the table every few seconds as Bill (the local pub hooligan for this example) repeatedly slams his plump, hairy paw on the already grimy table after hearing a particularly amusing joke.
There are three conditions to owning a pub in England:
1. You have to purchase a license to sell alcohol
2. You are required to erect a stag’s head somewhere in the bar area
3. You need a cliché name
Continue reading ‘The Rat & Parrot’
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Welcome to the sequel of the much acclaimed ‘There Are 5 Types Of Exams…’ article. I first contemplated writing one along the lines of the different types of women, but soon decided against it in the interest of my health.
For some, it is a place of pain and misery, of endless struggle and […]
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No, Harry does not make a surprise visit to North Cyprus in the latest book. And neither do any of the other characters either. And, nope, there are no spoilers of any sort for Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows, which I have yet to read (but am looking forward to immensely).
I was in […]
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I watched him.
Retrieving books from the endless row of shelves, poring over them with the mind of a scholar, and settling them down on the red mahogany tables when his arm muscles ached from holding a book too close. His almond brown eyes travelled the width of the paper; they were sunk beneath two […]
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To those of you who had faith in my application to Cambridge to study Mathematics, I thank you. However, on the 16th of January I received a very thin and ominous letter stamped ‘Cambridge’ on the top. I subconsciously knew the decision they had reached.
I ripped open the letter, unfolded one of two pages […]
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Firstly, Merry Christmas and a happy New Year to all!
Secondly, and more importantly, to all ye who had little faith in our beach + barbecue + camping plan: we did it! (albeit at the very last minute - we clearly weren’t designed with organisation in mind)
Setting everything up was a bit of a pain […]
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Ask anyone about Choueifat, and they’ll probably keel over and clog an artery when it comes to talking about exams. In the majority of our secondary years, we spend every week doing a multiple choice test on nearly every subject we take. In addition to that, we have to take three full-fledged written + […]
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The long haul from Dubai to England took ages. We left at 4:00 PM UK time and arrived at our house in Bedford at about 11:00 AM the next day. Our flight on Cyprus Airways was an hour late, and we stopped over in Bahrain on the way. I hardly slept a wink on […]
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Fillet of a fenny snake,
In the cauldron boil and bake;
Eye of newt and toe of frog,
Wool of bat and tongue of dog,
Adder’s fork and blind-worm’s sting,
Lizard’s leg and owlet’s wing,
For a charm of powerful trouble,
Like a hell-broth boil and bubble.
You’ll be relieved to know that this is not the recipe for the ooze they […]
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The story begins three Tuesday’s ago when, purely on a whim, I decided to bother to actually come to school to attend two lessons: Statistics and Maths.
Upon arriving, I found out that Statistics had been cancelled. The official excuse our teacher gave was that there were representatives from AUB (American University of Beirut) arriving […]
